Anyways, my two cents is that I also co-bed (just call me a hippie!)and have with each of my three children. I do it because I want to, my husband wants to and it the baby seemed to want to. It is always done as safely as possible and there was a basinette next to the bed that the baby also sometimes slept in. I used the crib as often as possible for day time naps and by 6 months old each of my children were put to bed, awake, in their cribs and slept through the night since (7p – 7A).

I believe that co-bedding is a parental choice that is each family’s decision. Chosing not to do so, does not make you a bad parent, just as chosing to do it does not make you a bad parent.

There are risks involved, but if we never did anything that had some risks involved then we would never put our child in a car, even with a car seat, because you know, x% of properly car-seated babies still die in car accidents…

By the way, my children are now almost 7 yrs old, 4 yrs old and 1 yrs old. And they each have their own bedroom and go to sleep in them about 95% of the time! No dependency issues here!
Great topic Aaron!

My son is brilliant-and I don’t need to look back at any blogs to know that I’m not just saying that because I want to look good. If i wanted to look good I’d lie and say all my kids sleep through the night and not one has slept in my bed. Parents lie about it all the time.

EVERYTHING we do, has a pro and a con. Every CHOICE we make with these innocent and small beings can kill them! If we don’t buckle them right, if we cross the street at the wrong time, if they decide to climb out of their crib and hit their heads on the floor or electric base boards.

I do think that cosleeping or not cosleeping you have to do it safely. No covers, no pillows, not too many clothes not too little. Be awake when you are feeding. Don’t be exhausted…etc..so many guidelines with the cribs and the crib mattresse not to mention the times I put my daughter in the crib who innocently tries to stand up and trips and wacks her head before I can get down the hall the minute she made a peep! Dangerous!

So many good and bad things about cosleeping but it is still a free country. I could go on and say manipulate how the other side of things is just as bad and detrimental on the psychiatric point of view.

I had this very discussion with a pediatrician friend of mine who coslept with one child and not with the other.

The older child is the one who cobedded, she is far more independent straight A student at a gifted middle school, 2nd degree black belt, most popular in school, well adjusted, well discplined, great sleeper…who loves her family. The younger one, sleeps fine and is just as incredible as the other, but slightly needy-I dont’ know if it has anything to do with their sleeping habits as in infant or not…who the heck knows…children don’t remember…my son HAS NO IDEA he slept in my bed as a baby-he doesn’t remember breastfeeding and he was breastfed for 2 years! When I started breastfeeding my daughter, I tried to tell him he used to…HE LAUGHED….
I guess my point is, I dont’ feel guilty each time I sleep with my child at night, but like every choice I make, as a good parent, I wonder if there is something better, should I be doing something more? Should I do things that don’t feel right because someone said it wasn’t right?

How often have I been wrong about my instinct? Not once…so really, I am glad Aaron that your point of you is what is working for you guys. It’s working for us too…I do think that if you are parent (or your spouse) drinks occasionally or boozes for bed, that’s just dumb…if your baby is tiny and you have giant pillows or blankets, that’s just dumb…if you have a sleep disorder where you sleep heavily…silly also, you shouldn’t cosleep or cobed or whatever you call it.

I do’nt know where I am going with this…but I guess it’s just as easy to say that you should than you shouldn’t.

Maybe easier to blame a parent in a cosleeping tragedy than blaming SIDS on crib deaths.

We didn’t need to have our son in our bed. He slept perfectly fine right next to the bed in his bassinet with a drop-down side with me holding his little hand every single night until he was six months and moved into his crib in his own room. He’s slept through the night every single night of his life. It’s all about the parent(s)’ need, unless you live in a hut with one bed. Do I think that’s a terrible thing? Not if everyone wakes up in the morning. It’s a choice.