It’s been a long day and I’m exhausted. Work, the doctor’s office (I have a sinus infection) and then coming home to play with an overexcited son. Finally he falls asleep and MJ and I lay in bed with the TV on.
I drift off to sleep, but it’s a troubled sleep filled with all the things I needed to do the next day and all the other assorted worries that you think about as you’re trying to drift off. But all of a sudden, I roll over and there’s Will!
MJ, who is even more against co-sleeping than I am, went and got him from the crib and laid him down in between us. And as I turned on my side to face him his eyes opened slightly and the corners of his mouth broke into a sleepy little grin. He clutched his stuffed monkey that he sleeps with every night and made a little cooing noise. Then he rolled over so his face was touching mine, and fell fast asleep.
There’s something about watching your child sleep that is so beautiful. When he’s completely at peace, his chest rhythmically rising and falling. His lips constantly making that suckling motion like he’s dreaming about a neverending bottle. The smell of his head which has become by far my favorite smell. Someone should bottle that because somehow it mixes youth, innocence and beauty (and a little bit of baby powder).
I laid there for a little bit looking at him sleeping and my gorgeous wife right behind him. And I realized how lucky I am and how happy I am, despite what seems like constant bitching and moaning in this blog. I love my family so much and even if there are some really tough times ahead, we’ll be OK as long as we’re together.
Tonight we have a wedding to go to. I’m looking forward to it because Will is staying with my parents so we get some adult time. MJ and I will be all dressed up with no thoughts of feedings, diaper changes or keeping him away from the cable box which is his new favorite obsession. But I have to admit that while I’m going to enjoy our adult time, I’m going to miss the little guy and my thoughts will never be far from his cute face.