This post also appeared on in the opinion section of the Cape Cod Times, a division of Ottaway Newspapers, Inc.

For the parents who let them sleep with them, I think it’s a bad idea.

First of all, I think your marital bed is simply made for the two of you. When you start sleeping with others in the bed I believe it just leads to bad things. Yet I understand the desire to sleep with them. They’re cute as hell and you just want to cuddle them all night and listen to their breathing. They’re soft and adorable and so who cares if they sleep between you and your spouse right?

Well, even though it’s tempting I still don’t think it’s a good idea. For one, even though they’re relatively small they seem to take up the ENTIRE bed. I find I never have any room anymore. And let’s not forget about the drool factor. Sometimes I wake up in a puddle. And then sometimes they even throw up in the bed which is just gross.

But the main reason not to let them sleep with you is because they’ll get used to it and expect it all the time. Then even when they get older and bigger, they’ll still try to jump up in your bed and they’ll be dependant on you to go to sleep. But what happens when you have to leave them at someone else’s house in the future? Then they won’t be able to sleep unless they crawl into bed with someone else. It’s just not worth the hassle you’ll face in the future.

And that’s why we discourage our dogs from sleeping in our bed. Why? Who’d you think I was talking about? After all, we were parents to the 4-legged kids first!

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9 thoughts on “Co-Sleeping

  1. You forgot the most important reason. Smothering. Not that overprotective parent type either. Legitimate, your baby is no longer breathing smothering. I want to shake the hell out of mothers who whine about how they’d NEVER do that like the people that have smothered their babies either don’t exist or did it intentionally. It’s not worth the risk!!!

    You can’t, despite what people think, control your body while sleeping. Especially that sleep of the dead, common in new parents. You could do that quasi-sleep so you are semi-cognizant of their little bodies but then, thats not really sleep so you’re not going to be able to give them 100% during the day.

    Sleeping with your baby is just selfish. It’s not to comfort them or any of the other reasons moms (and maybe some dads) are wont to give. They cut the cord for a reason.

    *sitting back, waiting for the shyt storm*

  2. Great post! Our Lab/Husky mix now sleeps on the floor in my 2 1/2 yr old’s room, rather than get up in the night with me & our 3 1/2 month old. Personally I think it’s because they are staging a sleep mutiny, but it is the cutest thing to walk in the next morning and see how cute they are snoring away.

  3. There are safe ways to co-sleep despite some people’s concerns for smothering their children to death.

    I breastfeed exclusively and my son would wake hourly and I could not get a wink of sleep after my c-section what with high blood pressure and all. I could not bare to hear him cry in the middle of the night because I knew I was his only comfort. I spoke to my pediatrician and she said if he is sleeping that poorly on is own there are ways to practice safe cosleeping…i.e. no pillows or blankets until they are able to remove the blanket himself, no drugs or alchohol before bed (which neither of my husband and I do) and to wear light clothing etc.

    He’s STILL ALIVE!!! And we all got sleep. When it becomes a problem like it is interfering with the couples midnight “sandwiches” have you, or anything else as such, the child should try a co-sleeper. Which is what we will do this time around as I want to help teach my child soothe herself with a pacifier (another EVIL device for children’s comfort).
    As for not being able to control yourself in your sleep, I’ve slept with one eye open since my son was born, he makes a peep, I would have had to get up and go to him, or rather open my eyes and check on him and go right back to sleep. I chose the latter. As far as SIDS goes, it does not coincide with cosleeping. The stories of mother’s killing their children are usually those who take sleeping pills or other such drugs, or completley careless about it. You can drink and you can drive, but you can’t drive drunk…der.

    As for cutting the cord;) For me, I would have much rather him be happy and sleeping in his own bassinet or crib than for me to giving up any alone time I had, but for me I felt there was simply no choice. For whatever reason, my son needed me nearby…and I can say that this time will be different, but all babies want different things, regardless of the parenting. I can plan all I want, but babies ultimately dictate what they want, and we are here to give them what they need. If we can’t sleep, we can’t give them what they need…

  4. Well, the post was about dogs in the bed but since the issue came up…I do not agree with co-sleeping nor will I ever try it. The only reason I would ever consider it is if my child were sick or needed to be constantly checked on. But otherwise, sleeping in the same bed on a consistent basis with the baby is not a good thing in my opinion. That bed is for me and my wife (and for when Will is older and has the occasional bad dream). But I think the negatives and potential risks (smothering, increasing dependency and failing to put my marriage first) definitely outweigh any positives in my opinion.

  5. When I was about 5 or 6 I was scared during a thunder storm and went in to sleep with my parents. I was squished between them and not very comfortable. That’s the only time I remember going in with them. I liked my space better. Now back to the puke. My cat was coughing up a fur ball and it woke me from a sound sleep. Before I knew it I pushed the cat off the bed and then fell onto the floor. Somehow I landed in a squatting position. It was a shock but at least the fur ball didn’t get on the bed. Also, kids need to stay in their own beds. I knew of a 14-year-old boy that still slept with his mom. Eewwww

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