Dressed To Kill & Wearing Makeup

Normally the title of this post would be a tip of the cap to MJ, because she’s the one who cleans up nicely. But alas, yesterday I was all suited up and yes, I was wearing makeup. Why? Was I experimenting with my sexuality? Cross-dressing?  Engaging in some kind of twisted sexual perversion? Nope, sorry to disappoint.

I had to get dressed up to go to Boston and be on a TV show!

It was all very last minute, but I ended up in Boston (well, Brighton actually) because I was asked to appear on “Greater Boston” with host Emily Rooney. Emily Rooney is a well known and respected former executive TV producer who now hosts this show. She is also the daughter of Andy Rooney, of 60 Minutes fame.

I was asked to go on the show to talk about the “sexting” incident in Falmouth which I wrote about last week. I couldn’t figure out how to embed the damn video because WGBH’s site was being difficult, but you should be able to watch the clip by clicking here.

MJ and Will came with me and it was all a pretty cool experience. Except for having to dress up and wear makeup. First of all, you should know that I have one suit. One. I have two dress shirts, two ties and one nice pair of dress shoes. I flippin’ hate dressing up because I’m never comfortable and it’s not who I am. I honest to God don’t know if I could handle a job that necessitated a suit and tie on a daily basis. Not to mention I’m fatter now than I used to be, so my shirt didn’t fit because of my fat neck. Therefore MJ had to perform emergency surgery on my shirt with a safety pin, which was only partially hidden by my tie.

Classy I tell ya.

So we’re in the green room backstage and I see a makeup artist and my heart sank. A suit AND makeup?? MJ smiled like an evil little smirk as I shot her the “don’t you dare tell anyone I had makeup on” look. To which she replied “If you don’t put it on your blog, I will.” Wives…always so supportive.

I was on the show with David Frank, a lawyer/journalist for Mass. Lawyer’s Weekly and David Hines, a 16-year-old Boston Latin student. You can see for yourself, but I think it went OK. I wish I only had one chin instead of four and I’d love it if my hairline wasn’t retreating faster than the French army during battle, but them’s the breaks I guess.

Afterwards we went to Bugaboo Steakhouse and there were children EVERYWHERE! I’m not sure if it’s the talking moose heads or the Christmas tree that comes to life, but apparently Bugaboo is where you go to eat when you have children.

Will was sitting in his high chair and these two sisters, probably 5 and 7 years old, came walking past him. The younger one, a cute little blond girl, walked by Will and then stopped dead in her tracks. She then turned around, walked right up to him and said “You’re a cute baby, I like you.” Then she planted a wet one right on his lips.

Will, being the absolute stud that he is, took it all in stride. I swear to God, he leaned back in his high chair and lifted up his left leg, resting his foot on the front bar. Just leaning back without a care in the world, like he’s Hollywood royalty and completely unaffected by strange women coming up to him and making out with him.

Damn I’m proud of that kid!

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6 thoughts on “Dressed To Kill & Wearing Makeup

  1. hehehe…I don’t even know where to begin…yeah I do. That’s so gay! 🙂

    Sounds very exciting, man. Good on you for getting the exposure.

  2. Congrads! I’m so jealous you were on TV!!!

    It’s impossible to be around Will and not feel the desire to plant a wet one on him. He’s that cute!

  3. I wore makeup once – for a photography session when I had a massive fucking zit on my forehead.

    At the time, I almost preferred having Mount Everest on my face than makeup, but looking back at it now, it was a small sacrifice.

  4. You know how I know you’re gay?

    Well, if Plymouth Rock Studios ever decides to film To Wong Foo the sequel, you’ll be a shoo in.

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