Feminism, Favre & Fools

I have to admit, I have traditionally skewered feminists and feminism in general.

I can’t stand the hardcore bra burners who use the word “womyn” because women has “men” in it. I balk at the politically correct zealots who claim a Sports Illustrated swimsuit calendar in the workplace is “sexual harassment.” And quite frankly, I think sexual harassment in general is too often used as a way for unscrupulous women — er, sorry, womyn — to get ahead in the workplace. Unscrupulous men too. In fact, I’ve seen firsthand evidence of that when a woman put forth a ludicrous lawsuit against someone close to me for sexual harassment. It was ultimately thrown out, but only after court costs and headaches.

But this whole Brett Favre fiasco (NSFW) is really pissing me off.

I’m sure by now you’ve all heard about  the Minnesota Vikings QB and future Hall of Famer Favre, who allegedly tried to hook up with a Jets cheerleader two years ago. Basically all you need to know is Favre — a husband, father and grandfather — allegedly took a liking to this cheerleader and had someone in the Jets organization set him up with her number. He then left weird voice mails for her. She reportedly rejected him at every turn. So Brett did what any of us would do: he took pictures of his cock and sent them to her cell phone.

Because that’s sane and all.

Look, I’m not surprised by this. How many athletes and celebrities end up either sexting or performing in leaked sex tapes? It’s astronomical. Professional sports players are not role models and they are certainly not model citizens. So if you’re looking for yet another column from some nobody on the Internet jumping on his high horse and condemning Favre for falling into an immoral abyss, keep looking.

But getting back to feminism and my opening statements, the issue I have with all of this is how some people are blaming the cheerleader.

As far as I can tell, this woman did nothing wrong. She didn’t give her phone number to Favre, someone else gave it to him. She never accepted his adulterous propositions. And she certainly didn’t ask him to send pictures of his tiny dick to her cell phone. Brett Favre did all those things of his own volition. And last time I checked, Favre is a millionaire and a grown man. Well, grown except for certain areas I guess.

Yet when I listen to talk shows, read comments on the Internet and talk to people about the Favre situation, I hear a lot of angst toward the cheerleader. A real “blame the victim” mentality if you will. People say she brought it on herself. That she was asking for it. They say she’s doing it for the money because she’s just another gold-digging whore.

The only problem is she didn’t seek Favre out. Not only didn’t she ask for it, she repeatedly told him no. And she’s had the pictures for two years. Two years when Favre was performing well and earning millions, even getting to the NFC championship game last year. If she wanted to strike when the iron was hot and maximize potential profits, she would’ve come forward long ago when Favre was still on top. Not now that he’s an ailing, fragile has-been who is three weeks away from (another) retirement. But she didn’t, and in fact still hasn’t. A third party came forward with all of this after Deadspin paid him/her. The cheerleader has never, at least that we know of, tried to blackmail Favre in way, shape or form.

Yet I’ve heard people — both men and women — call her a whore and a gold-digger.

She did nothing wrong yet she’s taking the blame. It’s sad and completely pathetic. Some people aren’t even bothering to read the details. They’re literally just making up the story in their heads and filling in the blanks as they please. Even presented with the facts of the story, they say things like “Oh c’mon, you know she was after his money” or something to that effect. Everything is pinned on her because she’s a woman, she’s poorer than Favre and she must’ve wanted a piece of the celebrity.

Not the wildly popular Favre. Not the grown man who sought her out. Not the husband of 14 years. Not the father of two daughters. And certainly not the grandfather of an infant boy. Nope, no one wants to blame the 500-touchdown, 70,000 passing yards gridiron hero. So while I may have knocked the ultra-feminists before, I can see how their views get so extreme and why they’re so angry. I would be too.

But even beyond that, think about how fucking dumb it is for Favre to have been caught like this. If you’re a professional athlete who’s married and been around for 20 years no less, how stupid do you have to be to leave someone voice mails? And not only that, to send pictures of your dick that can be saved, passed around or posted on the Internet. Favre is not only a scumbag, he’s the dumbest scumbag on the planet.

But as I listen to the people who defend him, I’m left to wonder if they’re defending him because he’s a famous athlete or simply because he’s a man. Look, are there quintessential gold-digging whores out there? Absolutely. Both male and female. And I’m fully aware there are men and women who make a habit of targeting the rich and famous for extortion purposes. I get it.

But that’s not always the case. And it certainly doesn’t seem like what’s happening here. So stop blaming a woman who did nothing wrong. Stop making up stories to suit your own misogynistic beliefs. And place the blame on Favre, the married guy who not only tried to cheat on his wife and shame his family, but did so on tape and (literally) in the flesh.

And I thought his fourth quarter back-breaking interceptions were the worst thing about him.

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20 thoughts on “Feminism, Favre & Fools

  1. I haven’t been fully aware of this situation. Just heard people talking about it but didn’t pay too much attention. Not much surprises me where celebrities are concerned any more. R Kelly pissing on a little girl and then being acquitted of the charges pretty much stunted my sense of disbelief.

    I did get a rollicking good laugh out of the cell photos though. When you’re used to seeing a solid 9 on a regular basis, those photos are comedy.

  2. Pretty sure cheating is the only option left to him. I bet a dollar to a donut his wife is banging any thing that stands still long enough.

  3. Thank you! This needed to be said, and you did a great job of pointing out how wrong it is to blame this victim of Favre’s harassment.

  4. I’m not sure why, but I remain constantly amazed at the judgements imposed on others by people who know NOTHING about the situation. Even now, the female who was harassed is trying to stay out of the limelight and continue on with her life. Let the poor woman keep her privacy, and quit blaming her for existing. Favre is an ass and needs to be strung up by his tiny dick. Thanks for the post.

  5. Personally, the bigger issue in my mind, is why are we even still talking about this?
    News media, social media, blog posts.
    Who gives a shit?
    His personal life is none of our business…
    sure, when someone becomes a ‘celebrity’ they do become our business to an extent…but I will never understand why so much valuable space goes to this sort of thing…
    there are other things going on in the world that to me seem a little *bigger* than Brett Favre’s teeny weeny

  6. darcie: As a member of the news media, I love this question.

    We’re talking about it because TONS of people give a shit. I’m not saying that’s right or wrong, it’s just fact. An inordinate number of people give a shit. Multiple shits actually.

    And his personal life is our business. He’s a celebrity. He performs on national TV. He makes the decision to enter our lives not just through sports, but also advertising. He tells us to buy Wrangler jeans and willingly puts himself in the spotlight. And for the last three years, he has willingly made a public spectacle of himself when it comes deciding whether or not to retire.

    The media devotes so much time to this because this is what the majority of the public wants. Whether those sanctimonious bastards admit it or not. People eat this stuff up. They devour it online, in print and on TV. And even though they try to turn their nose up at it when they’re done, they know the truth.

    And the truth is if people weren’t reading it then the media wouldn’t be publishing it.

    The media survives by giving people what they want. If people didn’t want stories about Brett Favre’s cock, they would ignore them and the media would be forced to give the public something else. But this is what the public wants. Celebrities, gossip, scandal and sex. That’s where it’s at. And until those are no longer the priority of the American public, the media will continue to feed people what they crave.

    So bottom line, people shouldn’t hate the media for this stuff. They should hate themselves.

  7. Well…there you have it huh?
    So what you are saying is…
    Brett Farve’s weenis is going to continue to dominate my twitter feed?

  8. I don’t think I’m a fool for thinking that Jenn is not the victim she claims to be. I as a woman myself, if I didn’t like someone sending me unwanted texts, especially texts of their dick, and calling me and leaving me message constantly, I would not wait 2 years to come out with it, celebrity or no celebrity. She was never made by anyone, including Favre, to keep his dick pictures on her phone for 2 years. All I am saying is that neither one of the two are victims. They were both adults who did something stupid, Brett (a married man) for engaging, or should I say trying to engage, in this type of activity with another woman, and Jenn for keeping the pictures for 2 years before wanting to consider herself a victim.

    I for one would be pissed if a man was sending me unwanted dick pictures, especially an arrogant celebrity or athlete, and I’d put a stop to their stupidity right away, not 2 years down the road. I like sports, especially football, and I tune into a lot of sports news and I just hate hearing about this everytime I do, whether it will affect Favre’s career or what will happen to him because of this. I could give a shit less who they are screwing or what kind of cars they drive, etc.

    This by the way is a great post on your opinion of the situation but there is another side to the story and a whole other set of opinions that are perfectly valid too.

    I’m not defending him because he’s a man and a famous athlete and I’m not calling her a gold digging whore. I just think the NFL needs to take everything into consideration, the fact that this happened 2 years ago and didn’t seem to bother her that much then. I think it would be stupid to punish Favre or to fine him for this.

  9. Angie: Again, Jenn Sterger did not come out with these pictures!! She didn’t wait two years to “come out with it.” A third-party sold the pictures to Deadspin. Not Sterger. No one knows for sure what happened, but the going theory is that she showed them/sent them to friends because they were funny. I’m guessing one of those friends decided to make a quick buck and sold them. But whatever it happened, the fact is it wasn’t Sterger who ultimately came forward and she hasn’t benefited financially at all.

    You say you’d put a stop to it but put yourself in her shoes. She’s a cheerleader, he’s one of the most famous football players in history. And it’s already documented she was fearful she would “end up in a garbage can” if she can forward. She’s right. I’d be nervous too going up against someone wealthier, with more clout and more fame.

    Favre should absolutely be punished because, if anything, he clearly tried to fraternize with a team cheerleader, which is forbidden. Should he face legal penalties? No. He didn’t commit a crime. But he should be sanctioned by the NFL for conduct unbecoming, and fined or even suspended a game or two. Personally I hope he’s fined because a suspension might actually help the Vikings improve.

  10. So bottom line, people shouldn’t hate the media for this stuff. They should hate themselves.(DF)

    Really, I think its all pretty funny. But if you need to go on hating over a picture of a dick, far be it for me to say dont. LMAO.

  11. TFT: Favre will not be playing on Halloween. I guarantee it. He’s faking an elbow injury right now because he’s so awful, so he’ll either be out for that or he’ll be suspended. Or possibly retired for a fourth time. The guy is unbelievably pathetic and a total attention whore.

    Pats 31 Vikings 24

  12. Oh baby, the whore looked pretty good this weekend. Come to think of it, he just finished his preseason, so look out Patsies, Favre is ready to hunt.

  13. She’s worried about being in the garbage can by a small-dicked old man who sent her risky voice mails and a pee pee picture? What a dumbass. I would have told him “way to go Einstein, hope your wife likes these too”. I wouldn’t be showing them to others in silence for 2 years. Who does that? Either speak now or forever hold your Farve penis.

    Sorry but I still think she’s a dumbass. And he’s a bigger one. Stupid old man now embarrassed his wife, daughter, mother, and grandchild. Way to go.

    Now the kids have an item for “show and tell” at school. “Ha look at my grandpa’s peen”. Great. What a maroon as Bugs would say.

  14. I LOVED your video that you made of the abortion protestors. Your video made its way over to cafemom!! Way to go! Anyway, I came over to your blog and decided to drop a comment on this.

    I AM a feminist, not a wacky one that says “womyn”, nor do I burn bras, or anything nutty like that. In fact, many feminists , like myself – aren’t extreme at all. I’m a military wife and believe women have choices.

    Now, about your blog post. RIGHT ON! The reason people are blaming the cheerleader is simply because she IS a woman. She’s the slut and he’s the hero. She’s a ditzy idiot cheerleader that seduced him into sending him pictures, then ‘came out’ (we all know she didn’t come out with it)…. If her stuff was on Verizon, TEXT MESSAGES ARE NOT PRIVATE! There are all sorts of ways to get a hold of people’s text messages, not to mention when you’re sending that shit over wifi, it aint that safe. I don’t know why people think that stuff is actually “private” when it isn’t. That’s why they tell all those in the military to mind OPSEC rules. Because you NEVER KNOW who’s really getting your data that you send to others.
    Brett Favre is a bleeping idiot.
    Honestly, I don’t delete the pictures off my phone as soon as I get them. SHe probably got it and said “oh gross” and closed her phone.

    You can check out my blog, but I haven’t posted much there in awhile. But right on, I absolutely love your blog!


  15. The moment cellphones had cameras I knew this day was coming. If Bret Farve’s popularity is so good he should use it on volunteers. And if not, he should join the club of real folk who have to negotiate sex using personality and romance.

    I await the day where women don’t get blamed for everything so they can be volunteer hellcats. That’s a good future for everybody, right? 🙂

    Fuck Farve. That was an easy mistake to avoid and he didn’t.

  16. I totally agree with you, but would love to read your opinion of Charlie Sheen and his ‘victim’.

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