FF: Jon & Kate + 8 = Kill Me Now!

I remember the first time I came home and found my wife glued to the TV. Seeing as she has the attention span of a crack addict with the most severe case of A.D.D. imaginable, I was insanely curious to find out what kind of show was capable of keeping MJ so enraptured. And then I saw the kids. And heard the screaming. And then SHE spoke…

Yup, she was watching the show Jon & Kate + 8, which involves Jon, Kate and their 8 (count em) kids. Two twins and a set of sextuplets. Yup, that’s eight kids.

MJ watched with glee and wonder as we learned about the lives of these two parents, who have the gargantuan task of caring for eight kids, six of them the same age. I admit, I was intrigued at first. How did they do it? What was their morning and nightly ritual like? The show briefly sucked me in by giving me a glimpse into a world I can’t even fathom.

But then Kate started talking. And she never stopped.

Simply put, Kate is a real bitch. She’s an OCD nightmare of a control freak. Granted, that’s probably a good thing for a mom of eight. But what about the guy who has to be married to that mom?

That would be Jon. From the brief time I spent watching the show, I liked him. He’s very mild mannered, laid back and easy going. But then again, I guess he has to be considering who he’s married to. She snaps at him, openly scolds him and pretty much rips off his balls and feeds them to him on a regular basis. She’s the stereotypical condescending, know-it-all mom I’ve come to despise and I wanted nothing more than to offer Jon a lifeline. I wanted to take him out to the bar and sit in beer-swilling silence while watching a sporting event, with no talk of eight potties, monster mini-buses just to go to the grocery store and family vacations that involve 10 years of planning. We would just nod at each other once in awhile, knowing this will be the only moment of solitude in that poor bastard’s life for the next few months or years.

And when you do some quick research on the show, there’s even more reason to hate Kate.

Apparently they used fertility drugs to get pregnant, which is fine. But now they rely on donations of all kinds to get by, and I hear they even moved into a new house. No doubt that’s due to the success of the show, which is nothing more than pimping out their kids for new digs. Not to mention, Kate apparently made this comment:

“Society has a responsibility to help with the children, since modern medicine promotes the use of fertility drugs, which can lead to multiple births.”

Really Kate? You actually want to stick with that statement? Because you made the CHOICE to use fertility drugs and chance multiples, everyone else should foot the bill? Shut your mouth.

But the real problem I have with this show is I don’t understand why any parent who has just spent all day taking care of their kid and then putting their baby to bed, would want to watch a show about two parents who have EIGHT TIMES AS MUCH to deal with. It’s like some horrible kind of torture. I just listened to one kid scream for a few hours, why in hell would I want to listen to that sound times eight?!!?

Yet many women defend this show and that woman to their deaths. I just don’t understand it.

Yeah, we get it. Eight kids is a lot. They struggle. Of course they struggle, they have eight kids. If I had to take care of eight kids I’d be in a straightjacket by now. But this is what they chose. And more than that, they’re getting filthy rich off it. They’re getting a new house which they absolutely, positively would not have been able to afford had it not been for the show. Yet Kate acts like everyone owes her something because her life is SO hard.

I feel her pain. I know it’s hard for me when I’m using diapers people donated to me, feeding my kid with subsidized food and moving into a new house paid for by Reality TV. That poor, poor Kate.

So I will never again watch that show. Well, at least not until Jon loses his mind, strolls into the house piss drunk with a hooker and proceeds to take a dump on the kitchen floor.

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36 thoughts on “FF: Jon & Kate + 8 = Kill Me Now!

  1. LOL. Love the post, made me laugh pretty hard. My wife sometimes watches the show and I watch because who doesn’t love a reality show now and them. LOL. I agree it is hard with 8 kids but they did use fertility drugs and everyone is aware that the risk of multiple babies is possible. So if you are going to take fertility drugs you need to be ready for what happens afterwards. Nice blog and keep the posts coming.

  2. I actually love the show. I totally get your points but I think since the kids are older now the show is even better because you see more of the kids and less of the adults. I’m a touch OCD myself, and I only have 2 kids, I can only imagine how much worse I would be with 8…
    Also, as someone who’s had to use fertility drugs to get pregnant, you know the risk of multiples exist but the risk of that many is incredibly rare.

  3. I still watch the show. I think the kids are adorable, and now that they have puppies…well it’s awesome.

    Kate is getting to be too much. I think the arguement \well you would be too if you had that many kids\ is a moot point. Lots of people have a lot of kids, not at the same age, but they do. There are ways to handle things, and ways to NOT handle things…and she is taking the affected way.

    She has burned a lot of bridges with her friends and family and she’s alienating her husband. I would really love to see these kids in 20 years. I think THAT would be the interesting part. Not only did they get diaper donations, they also got hair plugs for Jon and a tummy tuck for Kate.

    Side note about her Fertility Drugs. She is 34 and Jon is 31. The twins are 8. So they had kids when they were pretty young. She \knew\ she couldn’t have kids due to her PCOS, so they did IVF….about 6 months after she got married.

  4. “she has the attention span of a crack addict with the most severe case of A.D.D. imaginable” – my wife gets like this too when she watches Discovery Channel.

    I’ve only watched once with my wife. Last week, actually. The whole family got in their SPRINTER to go to a breeder where they bought 2 purebred German Shepherd pups. So now there’s 12. Not to mention these 2 puppies will grow into dogs that eat and poop more than most adults do. Kate seemed pretty worn out by the whole ordeal even though she chose to do it.

    Somehow this all made perfect sense to my wife, especially the Sprinter. I don’t think I will watch again.

  5. I have not watched the show, nor have I had the desire to. I’m with you on the point that it’s terrible that this family has become rich because of their children. It makes me sad for the families out there who are really struggling right now without a reality show, book deal, and all that other stuff!

  6. We caught a part of that show. We only watched it long enough for my guy to profusely thank me for being me, lol.

    I’m not a proponent of reality tv to begin with. I feel like I’m the only person who remembers The Running Man with Arnie. 3 or 4 years and we’ll be there.

  7. Well, I have never watched the show, don’t even know what channel it’s on. Something about watching eight kids whine, cry, have diaper blow-outs and hit each other kept me FAR, FAR away.

    I have, however, seen them on a ton of talk shows. Yeah, Kate may be a bitch, but I don’t feel bad for Jon one bit. They sold their souls to the “devil” to be able to pay for their kids. If they didn’t think that that would cause huge stress on their marriage, then they are incredibly stupid. Does any family come out in good shape mentally from these idiotic experiments? I only feel bad for the kids. That is no way to grow up.

    Reality TV is not REAL. If you know the camera is there, you will act differently than you really would, and they will cut and paste together the “drama” just for ratings. I’m sure the producers will talk Jon into manning up and fighting back any day now, so stay tuned, Aaron.

  8. I have never seen the show. I can imagine that it is a hard life but like you said she chose to use fertility drugs after she already had two kids. I had no part in it and I don’t owe her anything. That comment makes me mad. I have to agree with you all the way. Good post.

  9. i like the show. i like jon, and the sextuplets and one of the twins. have you noticed one of the twins acts kind of like her? anyways, you know, jon lets himself be talk to like that. i can’t decide if it’s because it’s too keep the peace or he’s afraid of her. the season finale is on monday and there’s sposed to be trouble in paradise. kate does really irritate me though with what she says, her voice, etc., but i’m still glued to it like a junkie on crack lol jk not totally glued, just semi-permanent

  10. I have never watched this show.

    I have never watched any reality shows. That’s not entirely true; for a few seasons I was sort of hooked on THE APPRENTICE – but that was hardly a realistic reality setting.

    For an entire season I was hooked on JOE SHMOE on Spike, but that was in a class by itself.

    My life is too real for me to care about a family who is getting all expenses paid… move on, there’s nothing to watch here.

  11. I actually like Jon and Kate because they’re so normal. She’s neurotic and bitchy, and he ignores her most of the time, and they seem like they genuinely like each other and like they’re real people. And they’re kinda funny.

    Also, they really did something pretty non-invasive to end up with those sextuplets. Stimulated with ovaries? So it wasn’t like they went and got 8 embryos implanted in her womb and her shocked that they had 8 babies. Yknow?

  12. Oh and also. I don’t feel bad for Jon. He doesn’t seem to mind, and he just ignores her. It actually reminds me of my sister and my brother-in-law. She’s a nervous, neurotic, anxious nag, and she’s always harping on him. He ignores her 90% of the time, and they absolutely adore each other. Different marriages work different ways.

  13. AND (sorry for the 3rd comment) they used fertility drugs, but they rely on the money the make from getting paid on that show to get by. That’s not donations. I’m not saying it’s right or wrong I’m just saying, they receive a paycheck from TLC that covers their expenses.

  14. I watch this show on occasion – mostly because I see how life is with all those kids and think “wow…and here I thought I was having a rough day with ONE kid.”

    Yes, Kate can be a little much sometimes – but she, as well as her family, are real. They bicker, they struggle…but in the end they are still a close family unit.

    I’m curious where you read/heard Kate’s quote. From what I’ve seen of the show and interviews with her, this doesn’t sound like her at all – she is constantly saying how blessed and thankful they are for all of the things they receive or are able to do. This quote sounds more like Octomom.

  15. I’ve had the unfortunate pleasure of watching part of two episodes. TLC (i think?) was already on from something else we were watching. That show is like watching a train wreck in slow motion. Even my wife can’t stand Kate, but what scares me even more is the prospect of Octomom getting her own show soon. Evidence of the further decline of Western civilization!

  16. Miss Grace,

    There are some holes in your logic.

    They take the money from TLC to “get by?” I don’t think so. Getting by would be them working like the rest of us schmucks to make ends meet. They’re buying a new house and (correct me if I”m wrong) paying for Kate’s tummy tuck, all courtesy of Reality TV. That isn’t getting by, that’s profiting from being on TV and showcasing your kids and your lives.

    And besides, you really think we’re shown the real Jon and Kate? No fricking way. If there’s a camera in your face, you will modify your behavior accordingly. There is very little that is “real” about what we saw on TV from that show.

  17. I used to really love this show. Back when it was more real. Now every week it seems like they are doing some promotion or going on some free trip. So that part bugs me. It used to be normal like – how the hell are we going to get all 8 kids to behave all day long at a 4th of July parade. And the kids are ADORABLE.

    I think Jon and Kate are pretty real, as far as their relationship goes. If my life was taped, I’m sure you’d catch me yelling at my husband sometimes. And I really think they play up the ‘characters’ — they do this all the time on reality shows. If someone is a bitch once, they make sure to show every bitchy moment, and no nice ones. Not to say she isn’t a bitch all the time. She probably is. But I’m sure he knew that when he married her ;) I like that they don’t pretend to be perfect and have a perfect life.

    I’m not a huge fan of the show lately, but I think when it started it was entertaining. I think there are many worse relationships out there in the world than Jon and Kate’s! It’s just that no one’s taping those couples!

    And I think people (moms) enjoy it because if Kate can do it with 8 kids, they feel like their life and kids can be managed too!!

  18. technically, they didn’t actually PAY for Kate’s tummy tuck, a doctor donated it.

    And yes…I get the fact that it’s pretty much the same thing ;)

  19. Aaron-you need to watch the show again…they both bicker at each other, yes Kate is more nagging than he is but also says and does things purposefully to piss her off…

    PS: Watch the episode where Jon tells Kate to “take the stick out”. They really communicate about their issues-whether or not they are perfect.

    I dont like the way they talk to each other but its more genuine than the duggars…who hace 18 kids on purpose!!!!!!!!!!

  20. I don’t feel sorry for Jon at all. I used to, but waiting for him to grow a set of balls and stand up for himself got old quick.

    Watch this, hilarious!
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IATr2I2VgSY
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IrR9iHH9psQ

    I mostly watch because the kids are adorable, however I haven’t been watching much lately. The show used to be appealing because people could relate to them. In the beginning they didn’t go on big trips or have a ton of money. Kate also wasn’t as mean back then, I think. Now it is just faker than fake.

  21. Meri: Sorry. I can’t watch it again. I get hives just hearing it on the background. It’s a terrible show and I can’t watch it ever again.

    Beachdog: Nice! That’s MJ’s favorite show of all time.

  22. Dude, I only watch this show via snippets on “The Soup” (which rules) and I have come to find out that Kate is an unforgivable bitch. If I were Jon I would drink a lot–an awful lot. I didn’t know much about her or the show but her quote is absolutely ridiculous–no one has responsibility these days. The bailout touches even parents of multiples I suppose. Poor Kate.

  23. I really agree with you on this whole thing. The unfortunate thing is that a lot of people argue whether we see the real Jon and Kate on the camera… I’d rather argue just what the hell IS the real Jon and Kate. I bet they’ve lost the personalities they once had before the cameras showed up.

    And what’s going to happen to those kids when they grow up? When the cameras aren’t there anymore. When they have to learn that surviving means not having things just handed to you.

    I don’t even care if Kate’s a bitch or not and I sure as shit don’t care whether she’s appreciative or not. Right now they are raising 8 children in, what I believe to be, a very terrible way. A way that trains them to believe that everyone should always think they’re important and that everything should be handed to them.

    And for what? Publicity? Free stuff? I’ll take my hidden, “one of the crowd” life any day over that… ESPECIALLY if it means my kid will have a normal childhood.

    What’s the difference between this and prostitution? I’d say go with prostitution because at least you’re only selling your body, and not your entire family… ESPECIALLY 8 KIDS!

  24. So one night I stumbled across a hate blog for this show and these people (mainly Kate) and I’ve gotta say, I tend to agree with a lot of the haters. I cannot watch the show because Kate drives me up a wall.

    Your post? THE AWESOME.

  25. This is soooooo spot on.

    My daughter loves this show (I don’t know why) and I found it odd that I’m rooting for a divorce in the season finale on Monday. Now, I’m just hoping Jon does what you describe in the last paragraph.

  26. I have never watched the show for the same reasons you mention. I have two and there is no way in f-ing hell I’m watching a show with 8. Nope….Give me something else to watch. Even a blank f-ing wall! BUT I do watch The Soup on E and see clips. I want to jump through the tv and beat her face in. What the hell? Poor servant husband! Poor damn guy. Why does he stay. Really. Life must be hell.

  27. Preach on brother! I couldn’t agree more with everything you said. I too got sucked into the Jon and Kate +8 madness! I DVR’d it for a few months..then her voice..I couldn’t take it anymore…so delete from the DVR list. Yeah, I do that all day long minus6 kids..so at night I want to escape that life and relax.

    The gossip is that he has been out partying and that he is telling people they are getting divorced. They deny this of course.. I may end up being Jon + 8 minus Kate.

  28. Oh man, I think every guy that watches Kate gets that feeling like they just got kicked in the nuts and they’re about to throw up! People like her just seem to be 100% sure that not only do they have a monopoly on all truth and knoeledge, but that their monopoly absolves them from haveng to worry about the needs of all the imperfect people around them.

    Jon needs to confront this and they both need to decide if they will work to change for their spouse. If, not……get out now. He’s not 100% innocent and far from perfect, but her treatment of him is abusive and demeaning. Right or wrong, he’s a 50% owner of the relationship. She acts like she owns it all.

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