Why I’m Fine With My Kids Growing Up So Fast

Sometimes I look around at all the other people on this parent blogger landscape and wonder what the hell is wrong with me.

As the month of June stretches its legs and summer takes off into a full gallop, school is coming to an end for our kids. That means lots of photo montages of the first day of school in September compared with the last day this month. Which is great — I did the same thing. But what I didn’t do — what I can’t seem to understand — is the average parent constantly lamenting the supersonic speed at which time passes and their inability to stop it in its tracks.

So many parents seem eager to keep kids young forever. As for me, a guy who has already gone on the record as loathing the newborn phase, I don’t understand it. All I wanted to do since Sam was born is hit the fast-forward button so I could skip ahead to better times. Instead of crying, eating, and shitting all the time he’s talking a bit, walking even more, and has even started signing things like “milk” and “more.” And, last but not least, he’s sleeping (thank f*cking God).

And Will? The best thing about my awesome 6-year-old is he’s gotten more and more terrific with each new day. He reads, he writes, he carries on meaningful conversations, he plays sports, he reasons things out, and he’s meeting life’s challenges with an open heart and mind.

Now don’t get me wrong, that doesn’t come absent complications.

He’s dealing with peer pressure at school and we had to punish him pretty severely after he got in trouble for drawing on a school bus seat. He doesn’t know what to make of girls yet, and can’t understand why they won’t stop trying to kiss him, which led to a pretty serious conversation about boundaries and respect for others. And recently he came home in tears because his classmates laughed and wouldn’t believe him when he told them it’s perfectly OK for two women or two men to get married to each other. These are all tough issues and bring about a lot of angst and worry as a parent.

But I prefer this stuff over Will’s time as a baby and toddler every day of the week and twice on Sunday. And Sam? Well, I don’t feel guilty in the least for saying I would’ve paid good money to skip through the sleep-deprived and terrible months following his birth. There was very little positive about that time and I’m forever glad it’s in the rear view mirror.

I didn’t cry when I dropped Will off at daycare for the first time. I didn’t lose it when he graduated preschool (aside from wondering why the hell a preschool graduation ceremony even exists). I didn’t openly weep and follow his bus to school in my car on his first day of kindergarten.

It’s not because I’m a cold-hearted jerk either, it’s because I was too busy celebrating those moments.

The more time passes, the more spectacular my kids get. Every day brings something new and incredible, and as they get older I personally relate to them more. It’s more fun, more interesting, and more challenging. I welcome those challenges, and greatly prefer this time to the newborn phase.

Parents of older kids will tell me I’ll change my tune when they’re teenagers and then adults. Maybe that’s true. I haven’t been through it so I can’t judge.

But even when Will is an obnoxious teenager who thinks he knows everything and I’m just some dumb, out of touch jackass who is too hard on him, I still don’t think I’ll be longing for the days of pacifiers, diapers, and potty-training. And I certainly don’t want to freeze time, because each day reveals another nugget of awesomeness and shows how truly lucky I am to be on this journey.

And after all, parenting is a trip that never really ends. It just evolves.


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5 thoughts on “Why I’m Fine With My Kids Growing Up So Fast

  1. Like you, I did not particularly enjoy the infant phase and do seem to enjoy my kids more as they get older.
    However, I do feel nostalgic and sentimental for the times that have passed. Questions I have include: Did I give my kids enough? Did I enjoy the phase enough? Each phase is a limited time and I want to appreciate my children’s growing up/development. I love seeing them grow.
    Larry recently posted..Everyone Needs HelpMy Profile

  2. I’m in the same boat, Aaron. While I’m cognizant of enjoying every moment with my boys, I will be happy to have our second walking, talking, and potty trained. I also love watching our eldest (now 3) as he develops into more and more of his own person, with his own foibles, flaws, and bits of awesome. As you’ve pointed out, my tune may change when they get to an age where they don’t want hugs every time I go out the door, or a bedtime story, but I don’t think I’ll ever want to go back to diapers and waking up 5-6 times a night…
    Sean recently posted..That Old Familiar StinkMy Profile

  3. “Doesn’t know what to “make of” girls? Won’t stop trying to kiss him? Bs. Stop. Females are not to be “made” anything “of”. Your Lil broheems are screwed with a misogynist dad like you.

  4. Every parents has a dream his son grow fast and remain healthy.. But unfortunately some parents do not care our child and His/Her kids remain lazy and Dull. I really appreciate you own you thoughts, planing . I advise to all united roofing ,parents please look after the our child because it is future of the nation 🙂

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