Tag Archives: turning 1

The Year of Sam

sam_standingwill_sam.jpgA moment and an eternity.

That’s what it’s felt like, Sam, since you entered our lives exactly one year ago. One year. That amount of time has never seemed so brief and simultaneously endless. Fleeting yet perpetual. And if we’re being honest, it wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows.

I endured your first year just as much as I enjoyed it. I’m not particularly proud of that, but it’s the truth.

You had colic and didn’t sleep well. You scared the shit out of us with a stint in the hospital. And frankly, I failed to bond with you like I did with Will. But someday, when you read this, I want you to know that’s on me and not you. And don’t think for a second we ever regretted having you, because you are amazing. It just took me a while to see how lucky I was and get over my selfishness.

Will was easy. But you, my little Sammy, are not. Where Will is hesitant and bashful, you are bold and fearless. Where he is slightly timid, you are a tornado and no matter where we set you loose, you wreak havoc. But one is not better than the other. In fact, I’m finding out the challenges you present make overcoming them that much sweeter because you make me actively work to be a better dad way. You make me a better person.

The good news is where I have failed, your mother has come through like a champ.

She suffered from postpartum depression with your brother, but this time around she has been Queen Mom. I’ve never been more proud of her, watching her shine and excel in her new role as stay-at-home mom. And you are so lucky to have her. So am I, for that matter.

But where you’re luckiest, Sam, is how fortunate you are in the big brother department.

It has been the honor of my life watching you and Will together. Nothing makes my heart swell more than the sight of you two together, laughing and smiling at things only the two of you understand. Will has taken to his role like a duck to water. He’s so patient and careful with you, and you love him so much. I couldn’t be happier watching you two play together, and although you’ll fight in the future I also think you’ll be the best of friends.

As for me, I want to apologize and thank you Sam. I’m sorry for the struggle this past year. I wasn’t a bad dad, but I wasn’t a great one either. And you deserve my best. But the good news is I’m going to work to be better and improve. Because we waited so long for you and now that you’re here, there’s no way I’m going to drop the ball again.

I love the little guy you’ve become. It’s so much fun to make you smile and see your toothy grin. I like the game we play in which we scream at each other and laughingly match pitch. I yell “gorilla baby!” and you beat your chest, which is fundamentally awesome. Watching you walk around and get stronger with each step does my heart good, and I’m so proud of you.

And the best part is, better days are ahead. But for now, happy birthday my beautiful baby boy. You completed our family in a way I only ever imagined. I love you.

 

sambday

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What’s the Big Deal About Turning 1?

All of the parents who are members of various Internet parenting groups I belong to have babies around the same age as Will. That means a slew of kids celebrating their first birthdays. And surprisingly (at least to me), it translates into a tsunami of emotion and crying.

I just don’t get it.

All of these moms admitted they were in tears at the thought of their kids turning 1. They cried when they bought the invitations to the birthday party. They cried when they bought presents. And they cried when they sang happy birthday and brought the cake out. They said it was sadness at the thought of their kids growing up so fast, and that they’re not little babies anymore.

All I know is that must be a gender thing. I know what I’m about to say may not be the most sensitive thing in the world, but I have to be honest.

I really don’t care for newborns.

First of all, they’re creepy looking. All of them, even Will was. They look like wrinkled little aliens and, truth be told, they freak me out a bit. Second, they are boring. All they do is sleep, eat and poop. That’s just not interesting. And since Will was breastfed, I really didn’t have much to do with him except change his tarry craps when necessary. What’s fun about that?

I am THRILLED that Will is older now. He’s walking, talking a little, doing some sign language, playing with toys, etc. I can toss him around, he’s starting to understand what we’re saying to him. In short, HE’S FUN! He’s interesting. He’s no longer a lump of wrinkled flesh who looks like the offspring of E.T. and Kuato from Total Recall.

Like I said, I’m sure this is not politically correct, but it’s the truth dammit.

And I can’t wait until he gets even older and more fun. When he starts talking all the time (I know JEE will tell me I’ll regret saying this) and playing Little League and soccer and bringing home math homework that completely stumps me. I want to take him to Fenway and Disney World and have father-son bonding trips to get our hair cut at the barber shop.

But I certainly won’t be pining for the days when I could barely get any time with him because he was a tiny infant perpetually attached to my wife’s boobs.

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Will’s 1st B-Day Party

Before I post some pics of Will’s first birthday, I just want to say a few things.

We are so, so lucky to have the family and friends we have. To my parents who babysit, help us financially and in every other way to my best friend Craig and his wife Kelly who bought and cooked all the unbelievable food to Barbara and Patrick who volunteered their house (because ours is tiny) which allowed us to have the party in the first place…we’re floored by your kindness and generosity. If not for you guys, none of this happens. And as for the rest of our family members, thank you so much for the gifts. Even though we said “No Gifts” prior to the party, you guys were way too generous and Will is one spoiled and lucky kid.

Thank you all, from the bottom of our hearts. You guys are the best and we appreciate everything in a way that you’ll never know. Now, onto the pictures…

A "Handy Manny" toolbox which he loved
A "Handy Manny" toolbox which he loved
Yep, that's a Thomas the Train Engine cake made by my Aunt Val. Unreal.
Yep, that's a Thomas the Train Engine cake made by my Aunt Val. Unreal.
Will feeding Daddy cake
Will feeding Daddy cake
Will and his godfather sharing a moment
Will and his godfather sharing a moment
Mmmmm...cake!
Mmmmm...cake!
On Dad's shoulders
On Dad's shoulders
Will's 1-year pictures
Will's 1-year pictures
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