That’s what MJ said as she sat at the computer and I loaded up the dishwasher.
We block off sections of the house using furniture, household objects and family pets to let Will crawl around. I’m not sure what caused us to be so negligent this morning. Maybe it was the blissful silence in the house which is rarer than an eclipse. I think it lulled us into complacency or something. But before we knew it, it was a little too quiet and MJ blurted out “Where’s Will?!?!” in a panic.
If you could see the layout of our condo, common sense would’ve told you he couldn’t have gotten far. It’s less than 1,200 square feet and there’s no stairs. But there’s no such thing as common sense when your kid is missing.
The next few seconds were a blur. I think MJ developed Wonder Woman type powers and managed to hurdle the table, the barricade and the couch all in one fell swoop. I vacated the kitchen like an Olympic sprinter out of the starting box as we both ran toward the bedroom. My heart was in my throat as I feared for the worst. Fingers in an electrical outlet? Was he eating something he wasn’t supposed to? Was he playing with electric cords and strangling himself?
The answer was none of the above. He had managed to bypass our barricades and had crawled into the middle of our bedroom floor. We barged in the room and he just turned to us and smiled. It was the smile that threw me off. It wasn’t an innocent smile. It was a devilish one that said “Didn’t even notice me giving you the slip huh? Get used to that big man. I run this MoFo now.”
That’s the last time I let a Golden Retriever and a Dalmatian babysit Will.