What’s the Big Deal About Turning 1?

All of the parents who are members of various Internet parenting groups I belong to have babies around the same age as Will. That means a slew of kids celebrating their first birthdays. And surprisingly (at least to me), it translates into a tsunami of emotion and crying.

I just don’t get it.

All of these moms admitted they were in tears at the thought of their kids turning 1. They cried when they bought the invitations to the birthday party. They cried when they bought presents. And they cried when they sang happy birthday and brought the cake out. They said it was sadness at the thought of their kids growing up so fast, and that they’re not little babies anymore.

All I know is that must be a gender thing. I know what I’m about to say may not be the most sensitive thing in the world, but I have to be honest.

I really don’t care for newborns.

First of all, they’re creepy looking. All of them, even Will was. They look like wrinkled little aliens and, truth be told, they freak me out a bit. Second, they are boring. All they do is sleep, eat and poop. That’s just not interesting. And since Will was breastfed, I really didn’t have much to do with him except change his tarry craps when necessary. What’s fun about that?

I am THRILLED that Will is older now. He’s walking, talking a little, doing some sign language, playing with toys, etc. I can toss him around, he’s starting to understand what we’re saying to him. In short, HE’S FUN! He’s interesting. He’s no longer a lump of wrinkled flesh who looks like the offspring of E.T. and Kuato from Total Recall.

Like I said, I’m sure this is not politically correct, but it’s the truth dammit.

And I can’t wait until he gets even older and more fun. When he starts talking all the time (I know JEE will tell me I’ll regret saying this) and playing Little League and soccer and bringing home math homework that completely stumps me. I want to take him to Fenway and Disney World and have father-son bonding trips to get our hair cut at the barber shop.

But I certainly won’t be pining for the days when I could barely get any time with him because he was a tiny infant perpetually attached to my wife’s boobs.

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13 thoughts on “What’s the Big Deal About Turning 1?

  1. My husband is the same way. He loves that our kids are getting older (not too old, they are only 5 & 2). He couldn’t relate to newborns at all (I heard a lot of “What’s so great about newborns? They just lay there, sleep, poop and cry!”) but now that they are older he really enjoys all the things that they can do. I can see both sides but I do miss when my kids were tiny and I was #1 for them! :) I think that is why mothers are more sentimental for the early days – as newborns their kids only had eyes for them.

  2. Well, I’m a chick and I TOTALLY agree!! Neither one of us liked the infant stage with our 1st…still don’t like it with our 2nd…and always say that if we could have popped these little buggers out at the age of 2, we would have. Things changed for us as well when Lili finally turned 1. We were so relieved to see her developing into this little person that we could understand more and who could understand us. Every day we enjoy her more and more! I’m not saying that there weren’t “fun moments” during the infant stages………but overall, we didn’t enjoy it. Our Will is now 6 months old (technically 3.3 months due to his prematurity) and he recently started laughing and smiling and rolling over. He is so cute and such a happy baby, but I STILL can’t wait for him to turn 1 and to see his progression into a little man after that! Aside from the fact that infants don’t do a whole lot, that stage is SO HARD for me to comprehend. I never know what they want…I hate the “guessing game” as to why they might be crying or fussy…bleh… Hooray for October 30, 2009!

  3. I felt exactly like you until my son was born. Honestly, every moment I’ve spent with him has been miraculous and wonderful – even the rough ones. I cherish the hours I spent with his helpless and needy little body squirming or sleeping in my arms. I didn’t find his infancy boring at all. Those months were blessings and I can’t wait to experience with #2 (due mid-Oct).

  4. I am here to defend my honor. I am not a metrosexual. That is why I got mad at my wife for calling me a pretty boy. The only hygiene products I own are toothpaste, deodorant, and hair gel. I go to a barber with a striped pole out front. I have never and will never have a manicure, pedicure, tanning session, eye brow trimming, or whatever other weird things metrosexuals do. I just like to look nice. Remember that all things are relative. We probably have 10 or 12 metrosexuals in the entire state of Arkansas and I am certain they get beat up quite a bit.

    Braden is a lot more fun now at 5 months and he gets to be more fun every day.

  5. It is bittersweet to see your little ones get older because they’re only babies for such a short time and the older they get the older you get. All that aside I didn’t shed any tears over my lil man turning 1. He’s getting more and more fun everyday. I also used to complain that he was boring after he was first born, lol.

  6. Jenn: I think you’re right, that’s how it’s been explained to me. But I still don’t get it. Probably just a gender issue.

    Andrea: Right on and Oct. 30 is my brother’s b-day!

    Atom: Glad to hear it. Don’t get me wrong, maybe “boring” is the wrong word. It was all new to us, so it really wasn’t boring. But as much as I’d like to say it was all Hallmark moments, that’s just not the case for us. I loved holding him, but a lot of that newborn stage was just painful between breastfeeding, no sleep, etc. We didn’t enjoy his infancy as much as we SURVIVED it.

    Otter: Settle down over there in Arkansas with your fancy shirts and your perfectly gelled hair. The sooner you cop to your metrosexuality, the sooner we can all move on! =)

    BadAss: I know, it’s horrible isn’t it?

    Graceful: I understand they’re only young once. Maybe when Will is older I’ll have a change of heart. Who knows.

  7. My middlest turned 7 today. He’s lucky he made it this far. He started this thing a couple weeks ago where he imperiously says “I demand you get me milk” or “I command you to make me breakfast” Now, I don’t know what ill mannered friend he got it from but apparently they failed to explain the possibility that I may knock his feet out from under him.

    The 9 year old almost got put through a wall this weekend. He was being sent to his room for not listening. As I closed the door, feeling I had made my point, this little fruit of my womb rolled his eyes so hard and so far I thought they were going to go all the way around. He also spent a good 10 minutes arguing with me that Thanksgiving doesn’t always fall on a Thursday. He refused to believe me no matter how many ways I tried to explain it. I’m not a serene person by nature but between the three of them, I’ve developed an actual facial tic.

    Still, they are the coolest thing I’ve ever done in my life, lol. And they are even more entertaining than midget tossing.

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  9. I’ve always openly admitted that I don’t enjoy infants, even my own. Gets me lots of admirers, especially when they ask if I want to hold their infant and I say, “No, that’s okay.”

    Until they can hold their own head up, they freak me out. Then they’re just boring until you can get them to belly laugh on command or something. Call me crazy, but I love toddlers. Three and five aren’t all that fun, but I’m loving eight for now.

    Oh, and if we’re still blogging when Will hits the second grade homework, I’ll be here to laugh my ass off at you for looking forward to math homework! You have no idea…

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